This Is Why I Normally Order Pizza Online

My household had a hankering for pizza tonight so we decided on taking advantage of Pizza Hut’s Mia Pizza deal. I normally order online (through Papa John’s, mostly) but I found the Pizza Hut ordering process slightly confusing, so I ended up calling the one nearest the house:

Pizza Hut: Thanks for calling Pizza Hut, may I have your phone number please?

Jon: Yes, it is 503 – ### – ####

PH: The last four digits are ####?

Jon: No, it’s ####.

PH: Oh, thank you. And your address please?

Jon: Yes, it’s [tells PH lady his address]

PH: And what city?

Jon: Uh, didn’t I call a Portland Pizza Hut?

PH: Yes, but this is a call center.

Jon: Oh, I see. Well, I’m in Portland.

PH: Is that in Oregon?

Jon: Uh, yeah.

PH: Okay, and what would you like to order?

Jon: I’d like to order the Mia’s Pizza special you have. If I understand correctly, it’s $5.00 each pizza if I ordered 3 or more, right?

PH: Yes, it’s $5.55 per pizza.

Jon: I’m sorry, did you say $5.00 per pizza?

PH: Yes, it’s $5.55 per pizza.

Jon: Did you say $5.55 per pizza? Your advertisement says $5.00 per pizza.

PH: Yes, but our minimum wage is higher in Oregon.

Jon: Excuse me?

PH: Our minimum wage is higher in Oregon, which is why there is a price difference.

Jon: Wow, I’ve never heard that before. I’ve never heard anything like that from Domino’s or Papa John’s.

PH: Well [lady just chuckles]

Jon: I guess that’s okay.

PH: Very well, your total comes to $18.40.

Jon: Uh, wait, 3 pizzas at $5.55 each comes to, uh, $16.65.

PH: Oh, we charge $1.75 delivery charge.

Jon: Oh, okay.

PH: Will that be cash or charge?

Jon: I’ll be using my debit visa.

PH: I’m ready for the number.

Jon: ####-####-####-#### and the expiration is April of 2010.

PH: I’m sorry, what was the expiration?

Jon: April of 2010.

PH: I’m sorry, what number month?

Jon: What number month is April?

PH: Yes.

Jon: Uh, 4…

PH: Thanks, sorry sometimes I can’t figure that out.

Jon: ……

PH: Will there be anything else?

Jon: Nope.

PH: Thank you for calling Pizza Hut. You have a nice evening.

Jon: Thanks.

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3 Responses to “This Is Why I Normally Order Pizza Online”


  1. 1 meggiewegs January 21, 2008 at 8:50 pm

    OK, I don’t know what bothers me the most… the fact that Pizza Hut has a call center…the fact that she felt that $5.00 and $5.55 were the same amount…or the fact that you actually had to tell her the number equivalent for the month of April. Honestly, that’s just frightening! Was the pizza worth the extra money, plus delivery fees?? God I hope so. LOL!

  2. 2 cheekybuddha January 21, 2008 at 8:56 pm

    Ah ha ha ha ha! That is just too funny AND annoying. I have had the same thing happen to me a couple of times. Makes one wonder what the operators are doing that they can’t pay attention to what you are telling them.

    Hope the pizza was good and worth all the fluff!

  3. 3 Bryan January 21, 2008 at 11:29 pm

    All I can say is that our nation is doomed.


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